There are days when I can't quite figure out how it is I got here. This mudddled middle. Without a clear direction or path to follow. Often lost...and sometimes found.
If someone had asked the younger 'me' what they envisioned this older one might look like - I'm quite sure it would not have been this. Somehow I believed that the life that I'd been living was the only one. A grand master plan..a one foot and step that followed another...a list that was filled with what 'to do'.
A perscribed life. College. A degree. A profession. Marriage and - of course - kids. And then? And - then what? Never did I entertain a picture of life beyond any of that.
Just as it should - it all happened. Everything and in that correct order. The family. The house. The professional hat I so proudly donned. All of these markers and goals - reached and attained and crossed off that oh-so-very-long list.
Change was not what I imagined. An economy that - right now - has no need for professional services. Children that no longer need my parental ones...or not in the way that they once did.
Here I am. That older 'me' seeking new footing and solid ground. A make-over..so-to-speak. A second chance. A newer model. Re-designed and re-created.
Yes - life is good!